Thursday, February 15, 2007

A little memory -- II

The ticket seller had sent us in without a twinge of remorse or regret. As why would he not when he was getting 36 bucks for letting a bunch of stupid children watch stuff they shouldn't, according to some old people in some "Censor board" thing? We sat in our seats, oblivious to these higher ethical principles and were enjoying the action in the movie. Until Jamie Lee Curtis went to the hotel.

If you don't remember this scene, you are either stupid or an impotent man. Jamie Lee Curtis goes to a hotel where Arnold, pretending to blackmail her, asks her to go. He's waiting for her in the room. When she enters, after small chatter, he asks her to strip for him. She does this, clumsily. You watch this scene now, it seems funny. But back then, for us who had never seen scantily clad women on screen, this was terribly, and guiltily, exciting.

When Curtis started the comic striptease, I remember the three of us covered our eyes, feeling we shouldn't be watching this(hey, we were nine or ten years old.) and it was wrong. We looked around us, eyes firmly averted from the screen(in fact, hands covering our faces to avoid the images reaching us.) and saw the grown-ups were enjoying the action. There were men, predominantly, laughing at Curtis' antics. There were also some who were wolf-whistling. We caught each other's eyes for a moment and grinned guiltily. Then, there seemed to evolve some sort of collective consensus and we took our hands away from our faces and looked at the screen.

Jamie Lee Curtis stood there, in bare essentials and rose in mouth, and it was the closest thing to divinity(a.k.a the female form) we had ever seen, till then. It was as though something had awakened in us and we couldn't take our eyes off her. She was, to quote Anthony Burgess, 'gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh.' We stared and we stared. And we stared. Then some terrorists burst in and the scene ended, much to our chagrin. We enjoyed the rest of the movie, though.

As we walked out of the theatre that evening, we were silent for a few moments. It's the silence that ensues when all people in a group want to discuss something but don't know how to start or whether to start at all. The 'discussion' didn't happen. I think we mutually agreed that we'd be killed or badly beaten up if anybody found out we'd been to an adult movie and watched a woman strip to her underwear. With a rose in her mouth, even. We didn't even tell the other guys about it. I mean, they'd all have rushed to watch it, I'm sure. But we were afraid they would tell our parents or grandparents. Which is the sort of thing some kids do. 'Uncle, uncle, Arjun went and watched adult film and all! Reeeally, he only told me! Yesterday, no? He, Vikram and Nachiketh went to Gokul and saw True lies. Adult film. Mother swear, uncle!'

I don't know what my grandfather would have done, had he found out. My mother would have yelled and blamed me, my friends, all society and finally herself(she had just delivered my sister and was understandably distressed at the sight of her second progeny.). My father would have said this was wrong and would then have imparted wisdom about how a son should be and how careful he should be and what road rules he should follow. My grandfather, I don't know, he's never yelled at me. So maybe this would have been the first time. Damn, I missed a chance by not telling him!

True story.


Harish said...

Aa kaala innu baralla kaNayya! Class kaala! oLLe kaala.

Anonymous said...

Yeah. Now they charge you Rs. 180/- for the same stuff.


Malaveeka said...


you write so well.

you ARE a sweet bunny. To borrow from Tangled.


Adult movie, it seems!

prince said...

Have you seen the new India search engine www.ByIndia.comthey added all the cool featurw of popular productslike MySpace,YouTube, Ebay,craigslist,etc.all for free to use and specifically for India.Anyone else try this yet? First to Blend Search,Social Network,Video Sharing and Auctions Into One Seamless Product for Indian Internet Users.

Sandeep said...

That guy is lying. You get only porn on his site.

tangled said...

I like when people borrow from me. It makes me feel important and all that.
This story was totally means totally delicious. The urge to chronicle Tangled's own tangled childhood is strong. Perhaps on a weekend.

Malaveeka said...

Ah my grotesque childhood...

I want to write about it too.

the scars and the bright lights...

Yes. Yes. Tangled.

Yours the welcome.

I like making ppl feel that way.

archana said...


Malaveeka said...

new ishtory plis.

Arjun Sharma said...

[Harish]Nija, olle kaala.

[Arvind]Yeah, in some places, you could get an actual show for that money.

[Malaveeka]Nijvaglu, it was rated "A", that movie.

[prince]See below.

[Sandeep]Olle manushya, haagadre.

[tangled]You should, you should.

[Malaveeka]The scars and the bright lights...channagide, very. Bega bari, odbeku.

[Archana]Yes, very aww, alva?

arvindiyer said...

Excellent read. Excellent blog and glad i dropped in through malaveeka's blog:) It was True lies for you and i think it was Tarzan the ape man for me (actually there are a lot more nude scenes with the woman and the monkey in the end when they show the credits):)

Arjun Sharma said...

[Arvind Iyer]Thank you. Likewise.

Tarzan? The Bo Derek one? I was able to watch that movie only when I was fifteen or sixteen or so. Still, nice one.